LMAO. If he turned just so (maybe an elegant 3/4 pose?) you could see slime oozing off the scales. Round here we crown slugs (See: Eugene's Slug Queen), but for this one we'll be wearing our stilettoes, the better to squish. Oh, did I offend anyone by advocating such violence? My cats eat slugs for breakfast. Good work, Hollie. Why aren't you on TV? ~Linda @ The Deep End
RE: Those cookies and "I baked them myself because I care so much about America and our women and children and cats."
And also, because after seeing him in action in that donut shop, the cookie shop owners took pity on their employees and refused to let him through the door...
I’ve always thought of Vance as boyishly (as in arrested development) unctuous, feigning then thrusting his real dystopian take on America. Must be from all that butter used to make those cookies.
You always make me smile… but your first paragraph here…. Killer! love it… I guffawed! I think that’s the word… meaning… hearty laugh.
It just gets better! Thank you!!!! God, sometimes I think I’m crazy… and you remind me, nope! You’re not
well I am certifiable, can't speak for you.
Then we all are. And happier for it.
Thank you for putting my thoughts into words! Well done!
LMAO. If he turned just so (maybe an elegant 3/4 pose?) you could see slime oozing off the scales. Round here we crown slugs (See: Eugene's Slug Queen), but for this one we'll be wearing our stilettoes, the better to squish. Oh, did I offend anyone by advocating such violence? My cats eat slugs for breakfast. Good work, Hollie. Why aren't you on TV? ~Linda @ The Deep End
RE: Those cookies and "I baked them myself because I care so much about America and our women and children and cats."
And also, because after seeing him in action in that donut shop, the cookie shop owners took pity on their employees and refused to let him through the door...
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/M__GVAqEPXM
😂
Oh, Holly, you’ve done it again. Thank you!
Now I am at peace as I await my post-menopausal-future of providing unpaid childcare.
It’s been your destiny this whole time
Nailed it!!
The only thing I could think when he was talking was, "douche frat boy". As usual, hilarious writing.
Brilliant.
Love this piece! Thank you!!!!
My first time reading and so happy I stumbled upon you.
I’ve always thought of Vance as boyishly (as in arrested development) unctuous, feigning then thrusting his real dystopian take on America. Must be from all that butter used to make those cookies.
Great piece!! 😃
Brilliant as always Holly! You have a gift for satire that delivers searing truths deliciously!
Far too accurate!!!